eeeethemole

Freaky friday

2006-12-29T06:19:00.000-08:00

what an odd day this is. i can feel my insides churning.

or maybe it's too much coke.

it's 1100 an no one's home yet. an old friend called telling about his messed up life. finally made himself happy in a long time. glad fer him. told me of other people's messed up lives. that was weird.

i was supposed to receive some mail but the dude conveniently forgot.

dad had a car accident last night i didn't even know of. this is what happens when fathers bottle up everything. they pretend everything's okay and their dumb kids get fooled too. then we live with the guilt that we should have been more responsible and asked them "how was your day?"

didnt get to meet up wit khal to discuss the script. had to run some errands for his mummy. maybe next week then.

Gahhhh.. grassroots tomorrow.. and babysitting..

what an awesome way to end the year woohoo.

Once upon a time in Woodlands Avenue 6 of Majulah Singapura

2006-12-02T07:17:00.000-08:00

Yay, got to stay home today. Even if I wanted to follow jace to NLB i couldn't.
There was some weird accident at admiralty mrt.

So Mirzan found a new passion.. LION DANCE!

It's funny but at the same time, still funny.
He looks like he's going into a trance.

Now he suffers from Hi-5 deficiency.
He needs L-O-V-E!!!

Too bad bibik confiscated the CD.
Parents were complaining about his stunts in the living room.

And I found a very, very old photograph of my mum.
Okay not that old, only 1981.
We all use Final Cut Pro.
Wait till you see Final Cut Pro v.-10

It's all in the hands, people.
Uh-huh that means manual rewinding, and play and cut and stuffzorz.
Wonder how they used to colour correct.
Think if we still use this today, a single Production class could last as long as a week.
A day of pre, a day of production, and three days of post.

Kanana for you!

2006-11-28T05:31:00.000-08:00

Selamat hari rayeeeeeeeeeeee.
Acer's being a biitchh~

Somehow battery fell out while I was mid-hibernating.
Then when I restarted it took close to 3 hours to start up.
Vaitaminit... it didn't bloody start up at all laaaa.
At 77 percent battery died. Now have to start up all over again.
Moohahahhahahahahahahahaha.

Dear very very good God up high in heaven,
Please grant proper functionality to my lappy. At least until I've saved enough for a new one. Or at least until I've backed up all my files then can you destroy it. I promise to delete the entire season 2 of OC so that I can leave more space for files that are beneficial. I promise to shower lappy with sweet sweet love and handle it tenderlier than a chicken.

Doesn't help much that bibik is lecturing me about how machines are like people.
They fall sick too when overworked.
and they need medicine quick.

Sitting on the sidelines.

2006-10-23T07:21:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow’s Hari Raya, but it feels like any normal day.
I’m not in the mood, dad’s not in the mood, family’s not in the mood.
Or maybe just mirzan is.

Bleurgh. Every year it gets duller and duller.
But I dunno why, I feel sad for my dad.
I miss him la actually, even though he lives under one roof wit me.
Our longest dialogue can only last for five minutes, and that’s usually when he passes me my allowance. And it’s usually the same things.
“Do you have money?”
I either say yes or no, then he’ll leave.
And it’s the same question the next morning before I leave, “Did you bring your money?”
And we just can’t sit still together. After 5 min it’s either I leave or he leaves.

Blakeblakeblarghwrghwrhwrwrhwgrh.
Sometimes I feel I got so much to say to him, but dunno how to say it.
Things are just sooper different now. bitchbitchhhhhhhh

So it’s his birthday next week.
He’s been through loadsa shit, and I just wanted to give him… what’s that word… comfort? I dunno la. I suck at these things. Mat and I are adults now. I hope he knows he can rely on us, okay maybe not me. But yes yes, at least more reliable than before.

Aiyah I’m such a bitch la bacin.

If your life were a story, what would be the inciting incident and what would be the climax that comes after?

Best of both worlds.

2006-10-03T23:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday the malays in my class started talking about religion.

We were torn between deciding what's religiously right and what can be questionably wrong.
Some of em want to go out every night, do things they wanna do and party the night away, but at the same time retain their religious roots.

They try to get the best of both worlds and find that compromise between what they'd like to do and what they have to do.
Personally I know and everybody know that life is full of bloodsucking temptations we'll often succumb to.

We'll always make mistakes.
And then we'd feel guilty after that.
But it's only because we're human.

For some reason.

2006-09-22T23:07:00.000-07:00

I feel really scared. I dunno what is it.
My teeth chatters but its not cold.
It's like my bones are having spasms or something.
But that frightful feeling is still there.
Bitch.

Mahathir Mohammad... Satar

2006-09-17T01:06:00.000-07:00

Merdeka!

I admit sometimes i complain about my brother alot, but there are times when you wish could just take everything and swallow them back.
The thing i fail to realise is he's the only one who properly knows what i'm doing in school and pushes me to work.
Coz i rarely talk to my dad. The only time i get to do that is when he gives me my allowance.
I do feel upset about that.
I can't talk to my dad the way i used to when i was a kid.
Alot of things have changed since mum left.
Even with extra members in the family, a maid, a stepmum, a baby brother, its not the same.

So after 19 years living under one roof i didn't know he had a blog.
More like 3 blogs.
All the time i've been bad-mouthing him he's been comparing me to GIlmore Girls, in a good way.
He wants to be sisterly-close to me but sometimes finds it hard.
But the thing i'm quite glad about is he treats me like my age, and the way i should be treated.
He tends to be over-protective but that's just big brothers for you.

I saw it and i knew.

2006-09-10T07:27:00.000-07:00

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder.
You’re so right.
I miss crazy taxi!!!

Neverbeminded about that.
My mind’s been going into a different zone lately.
It’s starting to think a lot.
It’s always been thinking alot but these days it just feels the need to take a breather and wander into a new direction.
I start noticing a lot of things from a different viewpoint.
And it feels refreshing.
So i guess that’s good.

I was recently reading a book called ‘the Alchemy of Desire’.
Its about a man who's madly in love with his wife and share unceasing desire for each other.
Just when they thought the pieces fit perfectly, their love life started falling apart.
Because (okay this part’s weird) of a set of diaries written by the original inhabitant of their home.
The man found himself overindulging in the diaries and drawn away from his wife.
Yadayadalalala.

But anyway, that wasn’t my point.
I opened to the first page.

Love is not the greatest glue between two people. Sex is…

yada…

… the desire had died, and not all the years of sharing, and caring, and discovering and journeying could keep me from fleeing…

yada…

Perhaps I recall it wrong.
Strictly speaking I did not leave. Fizz did.

Ok what?
I felt like Cupid just came down gave me a slap on the head.
Okay nvm I’m not starting on that now.

I realise that sometimes when something in your life changes, other almost very unrelated things change along with you.
In year 1 basic science we call it emergence, or point of change.
It’s just a sort of feeling you get.
Sometimes you see it as pure coincidence, maybe fate.
Sometimes you see it, sometimes you don’t.
So yep.

Docktor Kachang’s prescription of the day:
Having constipation? Listen to Desert Rose.
(recommendation: listen real close to speakers)

Do you read me?

2006-08-30T03:13:00.000-07:00

This is what i was supposed to publish:

I feel like being mean and ridiculous and angsty.
An old friend of mine smsed me this morning asking how am i.
But i didn't reply him.
I stopped replying him since ages ago.
Yes it's you iays. (i just realised it sounds like ass)
You've become the unfortunate victim of my sudden craving to slur sillies.
Don't worry, one day if i feel really bad i'll take this post down.
But i don't think i'll remember to do that.

Just as i was about to slur those sillies, by some magic chance he called me.
aArgGgHhHhh!!!
How in the world of ass crack did he remember my no.?
"I randomly pressed it."
Then he said "Glad to know youre okay."
Aaaaaah! Guilt-trippinggg!

Syai if you do read this................ hi :)
We're still friends right?

I love grow.

2006-08-29T06:24:00.000-07:00

This is the wrong season for a haircut man.
Yes in case some of you don't know, i had a disastrous haircut.
Apparently i turned from Natz to Nathan.
Grow hair, GROW!!!!
And it's windy season. Sort of.
So there's no point in combing my hair anymore.

I say GROW HAIR!!!
I swear i'll never speak of backstreet boys again.

Argh, tummy's giving a weird reaction.
After a pepsi, a green tea, water, pepsi again, and mocha.
I'm enjoying my fart fest.

GROW HAIR!!!

It's like

2006-08-23T22:56:00.000-07:00

WHOA 16 weeks have gone by.

i just realised we won't be having classes with E24Q-E25A-E25G again.
where toostoosmoos started and where random thingies and thingangjengjengs happened.

shimmy shuffle mise en scene anal beads chair race retro rocket michelle bang han hafoo waffle raunchy garfield crazy taxi bubbly farts hang nadim i've got a lovely bunch of coconuts douchebag fo shizzle ma nizzle shitake heavy racist jodiiii muahaha steamrollah. etcetra.

i will miss all that stoopid shenanigans.

now that holiday's here, i feel like i got loadsa stuff to do but i can't remember what.
looks like i need to do my own time table.

yea, can we not change classes. so not looking forward to the next semester.

Zip it

2006-08-13T07:27:00.000-07:00

don't tell me "I also got work what."
coz my freaking work and your work is different.
you underestimate me too much.

Sunday out

2006-08-06T04:59:00.000-07:00

Today was different from any other Sundays.
I actually spent the entire day out with my family.
Something I haven't done since 2nd year started.

First stop, old neighbour's wedding.
I got told off for not wearing baju kurung.
But I was wearing formal so I didn't care anyway.
And just because I was walking next to my dad ahead of my stepmum, I got told off again.
"People might think you're his wife!"
Um, okay.

Then my old neighbour asked me,
"You're in what level ready? Sec 4?"
I sheepishly said, "Um, year 2 poly."
Do I look that young?? Okay maybe XD.

Then we went to see my brother doing guard duty at Istana.
I'm not a very patriotic person but I love men in uniform.
Not love like all googoo-eyed.
But just admire the way they look.

Disclaimer: 1970.01.01

And go watch Hard Candy 'til your balls drop you douchebags!
Crazy cinematography.
And awesome plot.
Basically it's about online awareness and if you're the paedophile, don't succumb to temptation so quickly.
You never know when little red riding hood will turn on the big bad wolf.

http://www.wear-red.com/

Wear Red: a movement for online empowerment and awareness, inspired by the film HARD CANDY and its protagonist’s red hoody.

Students' sketchpad - Pokemaid

2006-07-29T23:49:00.000-07:00

Sweet child of mine

2006-07-26T08:38:00.000-07:00

I've dissed the boy many times before.
I thought he was only sent here to torment me.
Now I miss him dearly.
He lives in the room next to mine.
But I haven't seen him for 3 days.
The empowering guilt awaits its trigger for eruption.
Or rather, it's already erupted.
And it hasn't stopped.
I love the boy to death.
He's at a stage where a child requires the most tender of care.
They want to feel protected.
They want to know everybody cares.
They want be in complete comfort.
They want to feel loved.
And I don't think I'm doing my job as a sister.
School's starting to rock my world leaving me no time for home affairs.

But I think today I saw Mirzan in his purest form... ever.
He entered my room and sat on the bed.
I pretended to ignore him.
My instinct told me he's gonna come running to me, clamber up on my lap, and start banging away on the keyboards.
But he didnt.
He didn't even smile or try to piss me off.
5 mins passed... 10 mins...
He was still sitting in the same position on the bed, silent and looking around the room as if he's never been in here before.
Then his eyes caught mine.
They looked blank but it felt like an accusing glare.

Where have you been??

But underneath all that possible hatred, I saw something that made my heart melt.

I miss you, kakak.

Rachel hermione

2006-07-23T01:17:00.000-07:00

So much for a 24 hour marathon.
But the experience was priceless.
My muscles are aching like shit now.

After school we went for our shift.
My job was to just stand by the stage and help carry some equipments they may need on stage namely chairs.
Coz there were a lot of bands and chinese orchestra etc.
Sounds boring but I had good fun.
Just watching how Jus or whatsisname work was quite a fresh breath of air for me.
He had to ensure what needs to get onstage gets there quickly, what’s not needed gets off, and smooth inflow outflow of performers.
It was awesome how they could organize themselves despite some last minute changes and the heavy traffic.

I realized how vulgar backstage people can be.
Why the fucking lights so bright?! It’s so hot.
Are your people controlling the lights... ?
I think so...

After our shift we went to watch EMP spin.
I loved the feel and everything.
The music was crazy awesome, the glow sticks were great.
But I was awfully tired I could sleep anywhere.

Come morning I dunno how it became our job but we had to help out while some of them were missing.
I only had to help ensure the schools arrived on time for the inter-school rap.
Which went quite horribly coz 2 of the schools canceled out and 1 wussed out.
They decided not to go on right before they were supposed to go onstage.

Overall it was an awesome experience.
Something to learn for the future.

Booyah I haven’t do rj.

Oh jolly

2006-07-20T04:40:00.000-07:00

It's been a busy week...
We finally finished our animation.
And we've got Racial Harmony toms toms.
Not just pretty dancing girls in ethnic costumes.
A 24-hour marathon with bands, dance, music mix, drama, bhangrarobics!
Yaiy, still trying to get my hands on those glow sticks so we can rave like ravens!

Hmm, I got a 'nag'ative from my dad tho.
He says I should stop voluntary work for once.
Coz I'm under 21.
I was harh?! it is a school thingieee.
He doesn't like the idea of me staying over.

Oh my goodness, our Zither production ytd was... weird.
We only did sound check like 5 min before their performance.
But I think the sound check was the best. Lol.
After one of the girls gave the cue, with one huge stroke they went "kRIYAWNGGGG!"
Phwoar, electrifying.
I'm beginning to accept guzheng as another wonderful contribution to art.

Hmm, things to do for Natz in case she forgets:
// Rid laptop of junkies
// Pay Limiin $25 for ondotzero (which I regrettably signed up for coz I didn't go)
// Our next CAP event - repub rhapso (don't forget to send e-mail to advisor!)
// Study for UT (which I've never done but should start coz I'm getting loadsa Cs)

I vant to get new glasesssss.

And we all fall down

2006-07-16T07:35:00.000-07:00

Whoa, what a tiring day.
Doing a project up on the roof with the sun burning at 16999 kelvin.
The vitamin d's good but it just drains you.
I counted at least 4 times when I accidentally bumped my head against the window while sleeping in the bus.

Been terribly lethargic these days.
I've never submitted late RJs 3 days in a row.
Gotta remember to do RJs in sch so I can go back and waffle in peace.

Darn, I got my best record of 20 passengers in crazy taxi.
But print screened so many times eventually I only managed to get the credits part where they were showing random images.
Slengeh, slengeh nat.

Even though I've been awfully tired these days, I find myself less worried.
The past few weeks I kept waking up with such terrible headaches coz my brain had loads to think about through the night.
I kept going to sleep with so much worry.
When I woke up, I'd think it was just a dream.
Only to realise 10 seconds later that it was a dreaded reality.

I'm exhausted.

I say you don't know, you say you don't know. I say you don't know, you say you don't know. I say... you don't know!

2006-07-15T09:14:00.000-07:00

This week's been one hellofa shitloader.
But yah, I gotta write down the stuff I'm scheduled to do for my own reference.
And for all you shenanigans who think STA's about sitting back and shaking leg till your ding ding dongs fall off.

\ DMA

Today we finally finished painting our backdrop, the Queen, fortune teller, and guard.
Getting ready for our stop-motion animation next week.
Let's hope everything turns out fine rather than spastic.

\ CAP

Hmm, this is actually interesting for me 'coz I've never been really involved in a CCA before.
I didn't have a solid one back in primary school.
One year I'd be in choir, then the next I'd be in athletics, then netball, then back to choir.
High school, I was in basketball for only a year then I quit.
So Campus Arts Productionis is one of my first.

But anyway yah, we got a zither performance for next week.
I'm hoping for everything to turn out well.
Coz this is our first time trying to put a performance together.
Let's pray... for the sake of QB.
Wakakakakaka. Okay, kidding.

\ Film ig

What? Yah, okay. If time permits.

\ Racial Harmony Day

We'll probably have shifts for this but I don't care!!!
I'm gonna stay there for all 24 hours.
Nyearhs nyearhs nyearhs.
Just sit and stone.
Tho I'm not sure what we'll be doing.
Hahahahaha.

Hmm... been playing loads of Crazy Taxi these days.
Watch out ong schlong billy bong!
Lololololol.
Just kidding. I know I can't win you.
I'm not even gonna mention nora coz she's way out of my league.
A step at a time, Natz.

Here're some stupid random pick-up lines.
Wakakakakakakakaka.

. Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy
. Tickle your pussy with a feather? (What?) I said, "Particularly nice weather."
. I can see you. [Uh, yeah.] Great! Then how about tomorrow.
. Can I borrow 70 cents? (No) Then how about 69. I'm sure you can offer 69.
. I'll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.

Okay, I gotta waffle now.
Eyes are half-closed.
ZzzzzZZZzzzzZZZzzz.

Camel with humps?

2006-07-12T07:27:00.000-07:00

I know what camel toe is you shitinmyarseholes!
I did my research, and I'll display it nicely for you.

Definitions of camel toe:

` When her pants are so tight you can read her lips!
` When a chick crams herself into a pair of jeans and the crotch area has to displace the fat of her mound and the front of her pussy ends up looking like the actual toe of a camel.

Like when someone says:

"My four year old turned around really fast and ran into this chick's camel toe, when he turned back around he had a hoof print on his forehead"

"Is your crotch hungry girl? 'cause it's eating your pants."

Or simply put, it's just a pussy wedgie.

And I've got pictures to illustrate. Hmph.

Meet Mr Camel Toe. XD

See the similarity?

I rest my case.

And so it was.

2006-07-09T05:50:00.000-07:00

Think I feel a little refreshed after watching Project Joy.
Which was majorly awesome if you shenanigans dunno!
Kudos to Shannon and co. for the attractive play.

One of the best was Kebayarobics.
Where makciks in kebaya were doing aerobics.
Wakakakakakakaka.
So it was like watching women in tudung excercising to techno.
They should open their own night club.
Tho' instead of serving alcohol, they'd have to serve bandung or some other Makcik brewed drink.

Shitake, there's still loads to do.
Script and poster for Zither performance...
Finish reading Luke's book...
DMA...

Hmm, my bro actually fell asleep watching Mirror Mask.
Tsk. Accountants.
They're 7 letters away from truly appreciating art.

"Men love small ego because it makes their big ego even bigger!"
Chang errrrrr.

Dreeeam. dream. dream. dream...

2006-07-08T21:54:00.000-07:00

To be honest it's been an awfully long time since I properly sat down to read a book.
The last book I read was probably Harry Potter and The Order of The Phoenix.
But yea, anyway Luke brought a book to school last week called The Alchemist.

It follows the journey of a young shepherd boy who soughts his dreams of travelling and finding beauty in almost everything he sees.

A few years back, I got sick of the word 'dream'.
It was so mundane 'coz everyone was talking about it.
"Follow your dreams"... "Dreams can come true"... etc.

Back then, dreams were something that was quite non-existent for me.
I lived purely on realism.
Coz I knew my dreams wouldn't come true.
And I got sick of it when someone got into the dream talk.
"... tell me something I don't know."

But in recent years, I found myself dreaming alot.
About every aspect of life.
I started to have faith in this non-existent force.
And how badly I wanted them to be reality.

I still do fantasise alot.
I think we all do.
It's the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.

Mushed-mellow

2006-07-04T19:07:00.000-07:00

I told him last night.
No strings attached?
I dunno.
But I destroyed him.
I'm not that sort of person.
I don't destroy people.
But the moment I do, they'll hate me forever.

I'm so unready for relationships.
That's why I say infatuation is the best.
You get to enjoy every minute of it and there's almost no room for fugly, unhappy pouts.
I never thought myself to be in such a position.
I thought this kinda thing only happened to stupid couples, only to realise I'm one of them.

Even when I told him, I felt numb all over.
I couldn't feel the pain he was trying to stab at me.
But I think he did.
My head feels like it's about to explode at any moment.
Everything feels so confined inside, it just wants to break free.

I just felt like shooting myself.
I felt like such a witch.
I didn't even recognise myself.
I'm not that sort of fugging person!
Maybe that's how it ends.
Me getting shot.
I used to dream of getting shot alot.
But in one of my dreams, I came back to life after getting shot.
Which means I still dunno what it means.
Hopefully it means there's hope.

I was wondering.
What if one day I went to sleep.
And never woke up.
Where would I end up?
I'd like to try.

Maybe hell, for everyone I've crushed and destroyed.
Maybe Munchie Land, where I can be with other mellows.
Or maybe I'll just come back as a cat with 8 more lives.

But I still haven't experienced the wonderful things in life.
I want to have my first taste of freedom.
I want to wake up everyday with a smile.
I want to enjoy every single bloody minute of my life.
And of course, experience what's been claimed of the existence of true, pure, unadulterated love.

Realistic? I hope so, but I'm sceptical.

Mushmellow

2006-07-04T07:11:00.000-07:00

i got loads to say, but i'm feeling very sleepy now.
to be continuedDdDdDd.

My conspiracy of happiness

2006-06-30T08:05:00.000-07:00

Aye, it's been 1... 2... 3... 4... Hi-5!... days since i last wrote.
But a lot's happened.
Just like it would in anybody else's mundane lives.
Only mine's a little bit more exciting, I guess. Lol.

So yea, just got back from an Esplanade tour.
The theatres were massive esp. the concert hall.
When the doors were closed, there was so much echo and air pressure.
I could practically hear the droning of packed air molecules invading my ear.
And we walked out of class yesterday.
Garf made us.
Tsk, hard drives.

Oh yeah, we got names for our lil brothers and sisters.
Captain jack, hard drive, ong schlong, virgin mary, cave of isolation and little lamb (i think so).
Not forgetting Eddie's - retro rocket.
Lols.

Here's a treat for chocolate lovers.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like if everyone knew only of Happiness.
Or maybe HAPPINESS.
Extreme euphoria of every form.
Yep... dancing rainbows, singing flowers, smiling sunshine, the entire Teletubbie bit.
Then there wouldn't be such things as anguish, hurt, turmoil, madness, confusion, melancholy, noir, or plain sadness.
That sounds like an absolutely perfect dream to me.

Then I thought of exploding marshmallows.
Coz marshmallows make me happy.
What if clouds exploded into marshmallows instead of rain when it got heavy?
Lol okay, too random.

Yarly

2006-06-26T06:31:00.000-07:00

I'm too lazy to update but I just did.

Haa haa haaaaa.

Screwed

2006-06-23T07:49:00.000-07:00

I have something mean to say, but I ain't saying it.

D'oh!

I'm alot more screwed than this

2006-06-23T06:14:00.000-07:00

I didn't go school today 'coz I couldn't get up again.
I had this terrible headache since yesterday.
So I had to sleep it off.

I realize I've been peeling the dried skin on my right knee, but I forgot how I got it.
Then I remembered!
It was that night when we sneaked out and crawled on the carpet.
Lolololol. That was fun.
The scar of adventure is on my right knee!
Okay, random.

I actually missed my last ever lesson with Tim Clark today.
Nehiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.
I always reached class earlier than him.
And he'd sing me praises for it.
But, but... I didn't come todayyyy.
I didn't know he wasn't facilitating us anymore.
Kanizzle!!!!

Loads more things to do ahead.
AMD // tcejorp enuj // stol erom i t'nod rebmemer

iMofo

2006-06-19T20:15:00.000-07:00

I've got lots on my mind now.
But I dunno which to turn to.
(Arranged not according to priority)

// Film IGizzle

Finally we're done with editing! Woohoo!
Sat in school 'til 9.30pm, and gave our final magical touches.
We played loadsa random football, and random le parkour (for me, it was more like a random jump coz i only managed to jump over a box).
Watching Garf try to kick the ball reminded me strongly of how Mirzan tried to kick a ball.
A full swing of the leg but no contact with the ball.
Cute, haha.

(Note: The Omen is boring. I literally slept at the back, tho' Infra and Noir won't believe me. But they did manage to experience a good dolby surround sound by the ear. Hafoomph!)

Oh yah! Porject Juen's due next week!
And we're re-scripting it and... and... we haven't started!
Kanizzle.

// DMA

To my team of princesses and the pea:
Sorry for not turning up for class today.
I couldn't get up in the morning.
I shan't give anymore stupid alibis, but I'm terribly sorry.
Especially to Garfie.

// the BF

I realise I'm terribly horrid at relationships.
Sorry for not having time to spend with you.
Currently my life seems to revolve around school alot.
And to find a compromise is my biggest challenge.
Please be patient.

// friends namely toostoosmoos

Hmm, couldn't ask for a better bunch :-)

// High school pals

After reading this, you prolly wouldn't wanna be friends with me anymore.

"Haiz, I felt angry, piss off and sad coz my bestfriends never come.. They always like that.. Every outting or etc sure got reasons one not to turn up..Fed up sia..Don even wish to make an effort lor & they sometimes bastard me lah. Haiz,What sia they all.. This called BESTFRIENDS meh??? Frankly speaking lah, I enjoy being with this group of friends instead of my bestfriends lah.. I no regreds lah coz I have enough of their non sense.. Well,the last time I met my bestfriends (Natz and Ruz) was year 2004 Graduation Night..That was long ago and after that got gathering they never come..How I wish they read my entry and let them feel bad about it!!!ARGH!!!Anyway..Who cares lah they didnt turn up..I enjoy myself and have fun with the rest I happy already.."

I'm a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, undependable "best" friend.

Lange if you see me on the streets give me your best punch.
I deserve it for every gathering I missed.
I don't remember my excuses, but yeah.

Hafoo

2006-06-17T20:10:00.000-07:00

I feel like being random again.

Random days come, random days go.
Random days come, with dancing rainbows.

Lol.

Infatuation is one of the most beautiful natural occurences in the human cycle.
Even if it doesn't reach its destination.
You get caught in a moment where you swear little butterflies are dancing all around you, sparkling stars are shooting above you, and loneliness becomes a bliss because you actually get to spend time alone with him, physically or virtually.

Hahaha, I just love sharing stories.
Thank you for an absolutely lovely summer : )

Shall succumb to my stone factory now.
Hafooooo.

If only.

2006-06-16T17:24:00.000-07:00

Just got back from Film IG camp.
I'm smelly, I'm tired, I'm cramping, I'm throbbing, I feel a booger invasion in my nose and I've got more troubles ahead of me.

I haven't bathed since Thursday morning.
So I expect ants to be crawling on my bed anytime soon.
But we had fun doing loadsa random thingizzles.

We shimmied, we leapt, we zoom zoom zoooomed.
By the time we settled, we were as pooped as cows.
(Dunno how that came abt but 'poop' and 'cow' look good together. Maha!)

We did several short films and I had fun with all the lights, camera, action bit.
But the best part's when you're done and exhausted, everyone sits down to eat dinner and watch the films you did.
Wakakaka film criticism... Mise en scene!!!

But the most tiring was when we had to do our Project Midnight which was at um... midnight.
We were given 'til 8am to complete filming and editing.
The lack of sleep was absolutely draining!
By the time I started editing, half my brain's gone to tralala land.

Tho' it bloody hell tired us out we still had our fun momizelles.
Crawling on carpets giving our knees a whole new colour.
Mut crashing in.
Lying down on the balcony while counting stars and watching cloud formations.
Eating lunch and watching art of flirting. (Ghaz, pls dun do that to us again)
Crashing in and sleeping in each other's rooms.
Sharing stories of the heart 'til the early morn.
Trying to communizzle in izzles.
Shimmy whimmies.
Cam-whoring.
Etcizzle, etcizzle, etcizzle.

But yeah, the film IGizzles were cizzles!
Lizzle yizzle aizzle!

To tell a person something that means a lot to you is not always easy.
Even if it was a carving on a tree, a note on a paper, or an sms.
I wouldn't even have the guts to do such things.
So thanks :-)

Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang.
Who died?

Off to film campIZZLE!

2006-06-13T17:13:00.000-07:00

Shell be gone for next 3 days.
Hopefully my brain's still intact by then.
We're supposed to be mentally and physically prepared.
Film, film, film, aduiiiiii my synapses can't catch up.

I know why my synapses not gooood.

The electric impulse that travels down the axon to my synaptic terminal is probably weak.
So the excitability of my postsynaptic cell takes a little longer.
Causing a slower flow of information from one neuron to another.

Get the picture?

Shit-ake!
The tizzle shows 8.35-izzle, yo!
And I haven't pizzle my bizzle for the cizzle!
I mean, I haven't packed my bag for the camp.
And I gotta be in school by 10am!

Shit-definitely-tak-okay!
I gotta rizzle now!
See ya'll in 3 dizzle!

Stupid cupid

2006-06-13T05:59:00.000-07:00

I would sing for a reason.
I would scream for a reason.
I could find bliss with a person.
I could get pissed with a person.

Why's love so hard to settle with?
I'd love to give Cupid a good kizzle in his nizzle.

I got a title, yo!

2006-06-13T05:18:00.000-07:00

Dudes, do ya'll realise in all my posts I don't got a title?
'Coz I didn't fizzling realise that it was off-ed in my settings!
Slengerrrrrr.
I thought mine was spoilt or something.

2006-06-12T18:36:00.000-07:00

Vagoo does have a meaning!
Shannon gave me this link:
http://www.leasticoulddo.com/index2.php?date=20060125

Apparently vagoo is a euphemism for vagina.
It's a much more pleasant term.
Just like how you guys keep saying kotek.
'Coz vagina sounds rude.

So... vagoo!

Tho' another slang would be: vagizzle.
Like,

Guy1: Dang yo fo shizzle ma nizzle
Guy2: Up the big hairy cow vagizzle

Lols!
Coolioooo.

The suffix '-izzle' came from Snoop Dogg.

So when you wanna say // "Rack up the balls and lets shoot some pool."
It's supposed to be // "Rizzle up the bizzles and lizzle sizzle some pizzle."

And when you wanna say // "I really need to take a piss very badly."
It's supposed to be // "I rizzle nizzle to tizzle a pizzle vizzle bizzle."

Aizzle my pizzle, I gizzle go dizzle.
Whatever that meant.

2006-06-11T17:19:00.000-07:00

Now's my turn to say,
Bahhhhh to Garf and Mut.

They were staring straight at my faceee,
beckoning me to try them.
The quizzes, I mean.
Lmao.

Your Hawaiian Name is:

Anani Ululani

What's your Hawaiian Name?

Your Band Name is:

The Astro Panties

Band Name Generator

You Are a Little Scary

You've got a nice edge to you. Use it.

How Scary Are You?

Your Birthdate: June 27

You are a spiritual soul - a person who tries to find meaning in everything.

You spend a good amount of time meditating, trying to figure out life.

Helping others is also important to you. You enjoy social activities with that goal.

You are very generous and giving. Yet you expect very little in return.

Your strength: Getting along with anyone and everyone

Your weakness: Needing a good amount of downtime to recharge

Your power month: September

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Brainy Kid

In high school, you were acing AP classes or hanging out in the computer lab.

You may have been a bit of a geek back then, but now you're a total success!

Who Were You In High School?

Okay, this one's a little wrong.

If I was brainy I wouldn't be getting C6s.

Ekkk, unreliable.

2006-06-11T03:13:00.000-07:00

If I was still mad, this is what my entry would've looked like//

fuck you (imagine it at font size 72), DUDE.
All i fucking asked for was a sketchbook and pencil.
Why you so fucking worked up for??!!!

Bro: You better pay me $10 now.
Me: I only got $5.
Bro: What the...
Me: Oh no, I can't pay you yet. I have to pay $15 for film ig camp.
Bro: Then you ask me to buy sketchbook for what?!
Me: Coz I need it lah. I got workshop 2moro.

Then he started taking out all the fucking things from the bag and threw them hard across my desktop.
What the fuck dude!!!

And his excuse?
"I don't usually use my $10 notes."
Shit i still gave him a sincere apology.
But he didn't appreciate it anyway.
He just threw the rest of the contents on the table.

Dude, you fucking earn $450 a month and you can't even buy me a fucking sketchbook?!?!?!
I'm shit broke lah!
You get free meals at camp.
I pay for my EZ-link top-ups and still paying your debts!
And Dad still hasn't given me my allowance.

The receipt says total amount was $6.80.
Why the bloody hell you ask for $10 dammit!!!

And you're so worked up coz you "don't usually use your $10 dollar notes"?!?
There's more to life than money, dude.

// But now I'm feeling better, so I take all that back.
I don't usually curse family members.
But it made me feel better anyway.

And later I found out my dad actually paid for the entire thing.
My bro only chipped in $0.80.
No wonder he was worked up about using a $10 note.
But anyway, thanks for the sketchbook. XD

2006-06-10T06:53:00.000-07:00

Shitake, Bro’s gonna faint when he sees my cashbook.

1st week $53.90
2nd week $57.55
3rd week $74.80

Total amount saved $-1.55

HjjlghGYFjf654r^%yt^&TuhytYUyGY76567^&%KRISHNA!!!!!

How can I spend more than I have??
Odd-yang-paling-odd-sekali-ness
(which means erm, odd to the max I think.)
But it’s spent mostly on EZ-link not-bottom-ups
and other very, very, very, necessary daily necessities.

Anyway…

We’ve started shooting for Project June
and while doing the scene where the lift jerks and jams,
we got asked for our ID and chased away.
Obviously, the school doesn’t appreciate art very much.

And after today we learn thattt
Babysitting + Filming
= A lot more running + Headaches for Natz + a Daddy out of Garf :D

And here are some random doodlangs:

It’s supposed to be a shimmy when they kick their heels.
So yeah, speed, and reverberation of an electrifying heel kick.
Something like that.

Hahahahahahahaha.
I drew this when listening to Gwen Stefani’s 'Hollaback Girl'.
K, random, next.

Ha… ha… ha… ha… hafuuuu.

I call this one actionREaction
Wakakakaka.

Lastly, I meant for it to look like a disco ball
but it turned out to look like twirls of swirly whirls, fit for a squirmy worm.

So, yep.
The end.

2006-06-09T09:27:00.000-07:00

Thank you for the stones.

Thank you for being a friend.

2006-06-07T07:07:00.000-07:00

K I feel like being random.

There's some bubbly chemical reaction going on in my tummy.
I can totally feel it.
Like when you shake a can of fizzy drink and it gets all reactive and bubbly.
Like that la.

Hmm random days come, and random days go.
Random days come with dancing rainbows.
Where random days lead to, I really dunno.

Been stoning loads these days.
Come to school... go library... do "work"... watch DVDs... play Xbox...
Till the library closes.
Then we continue stoning outside.
Kwakwakwa.

Hafoooo!

2006-06-05T07:22:00.000-07:00

I rode the bike to school today.
Hot damn, I sure enjoyed the wind blowing in my face.
But not when I'm freaking wearing a skirt!

Apparently I felt like wearing my sch uniform today.
I really miss wearing it.
But I only realised my mistake when I got downstairs.
But I was too lazy to go back up.
So like that la.

Film IG today!

I gotta say, the experience of learning film in a classroom ain't the same as handling the camera with your own hands and mastering it.
We had to do some random short film on a random story.
I can't say much but I shall put it up soon.

We got a bizey, bizey, bizey week ahead.
So I'll just go waffle now.

2006-06-04T08:18:00.000-07:00

At last I've updated something!
Phwoar... I can breathe again.

We watched X-Men 3 yesterday.
Haven't enjoyed a real movie in the theatre for months.
I think we were annoying the others a little 'coz mid-screening
some would be shouting,

"Mise en scene! Cinematography! Noir! German expressionism! Film score!"
Tsk.

Film IG tomorrow.
We were supposed to have done our storyboard.
But we haven't even come up with a proper story.
Shit-ake!
But at the moment, our story involves shimmies, shuffles and a lot of random stuff.
And if possible, we'd like to sprinkle a dash of musical into it.

Soooo yah.
Gotta wait and see.

2006-06-04T07:10:00.000-07:00

Randomness is starting to rock our worlds.
We’ve been occupied with our shimmi-nies, feet shuffling, random jumping.
It’s the Art of Random Expressionism!

Jose shimmies!

I think we infected the gangSTAs.
Way to go, Joseeee.

Ong's big jump

Nora seems to be enjoying it. Lol.
But I should never risk my life again.

Sunny

Meet RP's new celebrity, Sunny. (or Sonny, I dunno)
He looks abit more tamed here.
But usually, he'd be screaming and dancing to whatever he's listening.
And we're his biggest groupies! Rofl.

Adam, I don't think superheroes and plastic bags go together.

I realised Ultraman has fly-like eyes. Lol.
Ikimasho!

2006-05-24T17:37:00.000-07:00

BRAVO to Shaggy!

Check out the video dudeboys and girls.
First attempt at music video-ing by him.
And mighty good it is, I might add.

2006-05-22T09:29:00.000-07:00

I dunno if I'm supposed to laugh or murder nor wo TAK aini.

She gave me this Mechanical Contrivium shit.
And it said "10 top trivia tips about Natz".

Let's see what a virtually-programmed nitwit has to say about me:

Natz has little need for water and is capable of going for months without drinking at all!
What the hell.
In honest fact, I drink gallons in a day.
If I drink too little in the day, I'll start filling up at home.

Edinburgh imports three thousand kilograms of Natz every year!
3000 kg of me?
I'm fat.

Natz became extinct in England in 1486.
Kanasai.
I'm supposed to migrate to England!
And shit, I wasn't even born 'til 5 centuries later.

Natz cannot jump
That's it.
I'm outta here.

2006-05-21T08:19:00.000-07:00

I'm terribly exhausted...
But I had an awesome time at FOP.
Thanks to club:g, camp colleagues, facis, almost as spastic year 1s.
And of course, STA. :-)

This morning we were made to mix the Ribena.
Which turned out quite awful even after numerous taste tests.
And believe me, there was a hell load of testing going on.
But it sucked anyway.
I guess it's coz we took the water from the handicap loo.
:X

Anyway, thanks banyak-banyak for the great time guys.
Esp. my classmates from E24Q, E25A, and E25G
(we don't have a definite class do we? ;) )
and the Babis.

See ya'll in school!

2006-05-18T07:20:00.000-07:00

We actually thought we were bust today la.
Apparently we got caught for chair-racing.
We were supposed to attend the Disciplinary meeting,
armed with at least $50.

Oh yahhh.
I borrowed $50 from my bro to pay for the fine.
And he was piiiysed.
So eventually he came up with an income AND expenses kinda sheet for me.
So that I could keep track of how much I spend…
And learn to save!
Tsk.

And here’s a new addition to STA:

K erm, just ignore my face.
It’s actually a doggy tag.
I can’t help not taking my own face if it’s reflected in the tag.
Robot's name is STAmpy, designed by Ee Shaun.
And we're all getting one!

Finally I’ve subscribed to podcast!
Thanks to nor wo aini!
Phoo-yo!

As you can see, I’ve only downloaded 1 item... some Techtronic sound thingie.
Sooo, long way to go!
Nyeargh HA HA HA.

Happy retards.

2006-05-14T04:08:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother's Day, Mummy... wherever you are.

2006-05-13T07:43:00.000-07:00

Damn. It. iBeenpissed.
By an existing life-form ever-seeking for mutual respect ...
Mr BBC.

Arghhh. Agrrr. Mmmph. Gffrrr.

He didn't seem to appreciate the video very much.

... Justification didn't appear strong as a team and so team learning seemed low...

... It was a shame there was no concept/gist of a story, but a kinda of eclectic montage of sorts...

... The resulting sound editing into the visual resulted in some marked loss in the meaning of Romance/Drama for the audience...

And the 2 almost literally killer statements:
... The team needs to reassess what is realistically achievable to answer problem and start at 2pm...

... Not the strongest of team presentation, nor team learning - even with 45min extra time...

*stoinked*

We love you too Eddie.

2006-05-10T07:46:00.000-07:00

Zoom
Zoooooom
Zooooooooooooom
Zzzooooooooooooooooommm!

Screech!!!

"Excuse me, were you the ones racing with the chair? Give me your Student ID."

... Busted.

2006-05-06T06:34:00.000-07:00

Thursday: Dear Esther Lauder brought us Hershey chocs.
Wooopee!
Dark chocolate with almonds.
As I unwrapped my Hershey,
I couldn’t help but notice some colour similarity
between my choc. and the dude sitting in front of me.

So I held the Hershey against his arm and said,
“Lionel, same colour.”

I just pissed the man. Lol.

Then we recited some tongue twisters.
It was so kachang putih and rojak,
it sounded more like a slur of curses.

Peterpiperpickedapeckofpickledpepperapeckofpickledpepperpeter
piperpickedifpeterpiperpickedapeckofpickledpepperwheresthepeck
ofpickledpepperpeterpierpicked.

Kachang-ness.

Friday: Nora and I went for the film screening.
And I had a blast ‘coz…
Royston Tan came!
(He’s the director of 15, Cut, 4:30 etc.)
His movies are all numbers. Dunno why.
The one coming up is '132'. Lol.
And he’s also a friend of Lavaman!
Wakakaka. Qool.

He actually had a talk at another lecture theatre
then he came to visit us after our screening.

After all the hubbub, we took a photo with him! Lol.
Actually it was supposed to be just Jannah and her friend.
But we all rushed in anyway, even Ee Shaun.
Hahahaha.

Phooo. Truly inspirational dude.

Mut brought her panties to school!
She dumped it proudly in the middle of our table.
When Lionel was trying to plug in his adaptor he said,
“This is the first time I have to move panties instead of wires.”

And Yahya looks very nice with a panty on his head.
I’m sure Nora would agree.
Hakakakaka.

2006-05-02T03:55:00.000-07:00

Hmm… this week is starting to look better for me… I think…

The first 2 weeks were really stressful
‘coz we just had an entire month of R&R…
Then WHAM!
We had it full-on in the face.
(clean thoughts... please)

We were being brainwashed with cinematography, aboriginal art, cave paintings, design principles, oral traditions, creative concepts, story-telling, image composition, drama, emotions, expressions, lights, camera, ACTION!!!

Nyearh ha ha ha haaaa.

Think I’m going nuts. Literally.

So yesterday we had Film Crisisism.
It was about film editing so we went back to basics – graphic novels!
Heeeeee.
It’s not that simple tho'.

You have to consider the sizes of panels,
The images drawn,
Close-up or wide image,
Angles,
Shadings,
Colours,
Sizes of images,
Significance of images...

Yadayadayada.

So these are some of our panels.

An ant hill.

A car driving on gravel.

Our so-called 'storyboard'.

Oh yeah… before I leave I just wanna say…

Don’t ever heed love tips from me.
Love isn’t a toy to be meddled with.

Words are easy to say but…

Love is something valuable you should truly cherish,
just like you do your skateboard.

(Mr Ong, you know it) :D

2006-05-01T08:29:00.000-07:00

Honestly, I don't catch up with GE but...
nowadays i can't complete reading ST without getting pissed.

The first thing you see on the frontpage of Home is,
"SDP split widens"
written in probably font size 100.

Yo! Even if it's true, couldn't you put it on like page 5 or 6?
You HAD to put it right smack on the frontpage
where everybody could see it.

And behind those words,
exploded 8 times bigger is a picture
of 3 SDP people sitting at the KOPITIAM
looking UNhappy in discussion.

Page 2:
"Four more SDP leaders to say sorry"
in a font bigger than usual.

Page 3:
"PAP has not kept to its promises: SDP"
in a font 2 times smaller than usual.

How come PAP's statements always get bigger space???
Unless if it were defaming statements, then the opposition gets the glory.

Pages 6 & 7:
- The Gomez saga

Written in fonts so BIG, the headlines took up 2 pages long
"An issue that cries out for explanation"

Then underneath those words there's a blown-up photograph of 4 people.

In Principles of Design, we learned that a dominant image is one that
catches our eye first due to contrast, space, colours etc.

80% of the photo was taken up by 3 random people
and their gigantic yellow, purple and red garlands.
And at the back, out peeks the head of Mr Gomez,
taking up less than 10% of the photo and almost out of focus.

And at the bottom it reads:
'Mr Gomez, seen here at a rally with East Coast GRC candidate Eric Tan, Ms Lim and Mr Low, admitted he had not submitted any application for a minority certificate.'

Ironic. They were trying to force attention to him.

So they printed out 2-page long FULL statements made by the ministers on Gomez.

And on the 2nd page, written in smaller print is,
"Apology sincere, let voters judge: Low"
Low Thia Khiang is WP's chief.

Who exactly is defaming who now?

The rule of journalism states:

- Your greater obligation is to your readers (even if the sources want the story to appear a certain way)
- You must use judgment and always keep in mind the need to be fair.
- You have a responsibility to your readers.
- You must tell your readers the truth — even if it angers your sources to hear it.

Their mind game's not gonna work on everyone.

.Please vote wisely.

2006-04-23T04:25:00.000-07:00

For all you people who haven’t stepped into RP’s new campus, here’s a sneak peek of it.
Photos courtesy of Hafiz Firdaus :D

This is the class.
Blinds down.
Abit bright, lah.

This is one of my favourite spots…
the library!!!

What I absolutely love about it is,
it’s absolutely covered in glass.

So when it’s raining, it feels like it’s coming down on you.
But you know you’re safely protected by the glass.

And also ‘coz… there’s no noise policy!
But please do be considerate about people
who’d appreciate silence.

Our good ‘ol canteen where I go to every morning to lounge,
sip bubble tea and munch on Taquitos.

RP’s entrance… Glassy! I likeeee.

The path home.

No, I can’t leave!
I can hear it beckoning me…
“Natz, come back into the safety of my glass walls!
You know you want to…”
Bahhhhh. Lol.

This is one of the best parts of walking out of school.
Illumination makes me feel all warm 'n' fuzzy
esp. when it’s displayed aesthetically.
The fountains and the lights give a pleasantly relaxing aura.

View of the west wing from the bottom of the ramp.

What’s that figure? In the middle??

Lawl.
That was me.
Apparently Fizzy took it while I was
gazing up the ramp.

Freakyyyyyy.

2006-04-17T07:42:00.000-07:00

Day 1: T209 - Film Criticism & Analysis

So Natz, how did your day go?

Just splendid! We spent the entire 1st meeting trying to get the worksheet from Eddie 'coz he couldn't upload it to LEO then we went for an STA briefing which ended around 1230hr and when we were starved and wanted some grub the canteen was overflowing with pathetic hungry humans like me and when we got back at 1300hr we still havent got anything done and when Eddie arrived at 1400hr we only just managed to capture the screenshots.

................

My day sucked. Period.

2006-04-16T04:05:00.000-07:00

Went back to school yesterday with Fizzy.
For no reason, really.
Just wanted to experience it before school starts.

We walked around his block, W3
which was actually forbidden to outsiders.
And we almost locked ourselves in at the stairwell
'coz we couldn't open one of the exit doors.

The entire place is just so confusing.

E1, W1 - Level 1
E2, W2 - Level 2
E3, W3 - Level 3 (Yay, Agora!)

So school starts tomorrow.
We'll be doing Film Crticism and Analysis
on 'Citizen Kane'.
And it's at... E2!!!

Know why I'm happy?
'Coz E2 is right next to the library
(I'm a book junkie)!

And even nearer is Cafe 155! Lol.
I lurveee the Yam Snow Blend.
It has a nice blend of yam, milk and ice.
Haven't tried that Kaffe Esplanade, though.
(This time, the spelling's right. And I'm a coffee junkie too!)

And oh yes...
People, you gotta try this new thing at 7-11
called Toquiritos or something like that.
It's like a long rolled-up piece of dough
filled with cheese, tar tar sauce, chicken etc.
At only $1.50!
Okay not that cheap... but it tastes like pizza!
I likeeeeee :D

2006-04-12T17:42:00.000-07:00

I got a littleee inspired after browsing
through a mag called Computer Arts.
So I started playing with Adobe to make
my own er, computer art.

But if it's fugly, no worries.
It's just my first try. Lol.
Hopefully it gets better.

Kay erm, the girl is my PG0207 mate, Joey.
And if you notice the star on the right,
it's actually supposed to say STA
if you can see it properly.
Guffaws.

So that's it for the moment.
Will be back with more.

2006-04-12T03:31:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was at the FOP.
Had a pretty rad time.

But we gotta watch out for the freshmen this year.
They're fresh, and they're good.
They could present with confidence and validity.
It's as if they've been doing it since they were a foetus.
If they're this good now, they could be experts by next Sem.

My only aim for the day was to be able to interact with them.
And Thank Goodness, most of the W16C-ians were Mr. and Ms. Smileys.
And this Indian guy from SHL wouldn't stop asking questions.

When's our break, ah?
Do we have to come back after this?
Do we have orientation tomorrow?
When does school start?
Will we be in the same class?

One of the student's a New Media student.
And his skit was absolutely amazingly plotted.
In the skit, the teams had to pick 10 words
(which were not related at all)
His team arranged it into a nice chain of events that seemed almost logical.

After FOP, I stayed back in school with Dhana and the others.
Then we saw Varian walk by.
I held my breath.
Ever since I wrote his review I haven't actually spoke to him face-to-face.
But turned out he was cool about everything.

But sad thing is, he won't be facilitating any STA classes.
He said he wasn't "qualified enough for STA".
Liar.

Varian invited us to tour the library with him.
Which was really gawk-some!
The library was huge okay!
3 whole storeys of it, with a cafe, a performance area etc.

But when you stand at the top of the stairs,
I know this sounds cliche but,
you really feel on top of the world.
The view is mag-ni-fi-cent.

We now have bubble tea in our cafe. (Yayyy!!!)
And there's another cafe called 'Kaff Esplanade'.
(I think that's how it's spelt)
It sells all sorts of coffee, cakes, pastries nonsense.

So I'll be going back tomorrow for the film screening.
Hopefully I could treat myself to something yummy.
Slurp. Gulp. Burp.

2006-04-09T23:50:00.000-07:00

Yayyy! I've survived 1 year with my honey, Fizzy... Love you much! *muacks*

The first time I met him was back in PL0202 Semester 1.
On the first day of school, he walked into class late.
He had on a baby blue sports tee and spiked hair
(which seems to be permanently flat now)

I thought he was Chinese at first.
But I got a bloody shock when he introduced himself to the class,
"Hi, my name is Hafiz Firdaus..."

I never exchanged words with him for the first 2 weeks.
I thought he was plain anti-social.
Then one day we got talking on MSN.
But we were still not talking in class, 'coz we were so bloody shy.

Then one day after school, we went to Far East.
I have to say I have a terribly soft spot for gentlemanly boys.

He carried my bag...
He opened doors for me...
He pushed in my seat for me...
You know, the classic kind of boys girls love.
I was quite taken aback because I've never met anyone like him.

But I think I was abit dumb, lah.
I thought that was how he treated every girl, that he was just really really nice.

But as weeks went by, I found us hanging out alot.
And he was still going with his gentlemanly ways when with me.
I got suspicious, but at the same time I found myself falling for him.
And the rest is history =)

I love you Hafiz Firdaus.

2006-04-06T21:01:00.000-07:00

Good news people!

From next week onwards we'll be watching weekly films for T209 Film Criticism & Analysis. :D

So next week we'll be watching a film called Citizen Kane. It's on Thursday at 4 pm. Subsequent weeks' screenings will be on Fridays 4.30 pm.

Check webmail for more details!

2006-04-04T02:41:00.000-07:00

You know we’re living in a world rich with youth culture (as compared to what, the 70s?).

In the 70s, everyone had that huge afro hair (even if it wasn't afro, it was plain huge), times of Elvis, Jackson 5, bell-bottoms, kids would hang out at the skating rink, Saturday Night Fever, disco nights...

What about now?

We’ve got iPods to our ears, low-cut hipsters, skaterboys, breakdancers, rock stars, fashion-ists… you get the idea.
We’ve evolved. But who do we blame?
The media?
Advancing technology?
Friends?
It’s just a natural phenomenon that youth trends change. In 50 years time iPods will be the most outdated thing ever.

But what if… youth trends can be CONTROLLED?

Which brings me to... Josie and the Pussycats! :-D

When I watched it few years back, I thought it was crap shit.
Then recently I watched it again and thought… this is a work of genius!
I just liked it ‘coz it was sooo colourful. The props, outfits, backdrops, and storyline.
In my opinion, anyway.

If you were any normal audience maybe you’d shrug it off.
But being a media student, you’d come to understand that it's showing what’s really happening in this world.
Media is one of the strongest medium influencing teens.

FYI, the low-cut hipsters that teenagers to amahs wear were influenced by people like Britney and Mariah in late 90s when their videos were broadcasted on MTV.

On Josie and The Pussycats:

Everything from fads, to fashion, to slang… the product placement… are controlled by MegaRecords, a music management team.

When kids pop a CD into their player, a voice in the background goes,

“Josie and the Pussycats are the best band ever!”
“They’re totally jerkin’! You must buy their CD!”
“Orange is the new pink”
“Heath Ledge is the new Matt Damon”
“You’re nobody without an Abercrombie & Fitch vintage tee”

And it’s played repeatedly.

So they’ve all been hypnotized… brainwashed… to purchase the goods.

In the movie, it’s called “trend pimp”.

They have a little department where all the trend decision takes place.

“The new word for cool will be jerkin'. As in ‘Dude, that's jerkin'”

“Feather tank tops, matching pants, kind of a Buffy meets Chicken Run.”

Come to think of it… were we hypnotized by constant exposure to MTV, them fuddy-duddy TV ads, and magazines to go purchase our stuffs? Are we victims of trend pimps? LMAO.

“I love this song! If I don't buy it, everybody's gonna hate me.”
“And, I also want orange shoes.”
“You guys, orange IS the new pink!”

“I am sick of my Reebok sweats. I need some Puma sweats.”

And one girl said,
“I think that song sucks.
I plug my ears when crap like that comes on.
They’re just mindless drones who gobble up anything you tell them is cool.”

Too true. I’ll admit modestly, I'm one of 'em. :-)

2006-04-03T21:19:00.000-07:00

I had quite a weird dream last night. I dreamt that Simon Cowell and his team were coming to RP for a visit. So they were sitting in the canteen. And guess who they wanted to see?
Me, of course! Lol. And my classmate, Wai Harng. So we were shaking hands when I startled awake. It was a rather exciting dream :D I love Simon Cowell.
I mean I really admire him for who he is.
A terribly honest bastard.

2006-04-01T02:15:00.000-08:00

Video of the moment: Christmas light show

There wasn't anything spectacular about the lights 'coz they're all the same colour.
What was really funky-licious was that there was this really upbeat funky-bulous tune and the lights will light up at the same.
So lights and sound would be in sync.
Lighting co-ordination etc. were controlled by computer. Awesome!

2006-03-27T01:43:00.000-08:00

Usually I don’t enjoy the presence of Mirzan (my baby brother) in my room because I know he’ll mess something up. But today, as I looked into those huge pair of puppy dog eyes, I just couldn’t say “no”.

The guilt was even stronger when he broke into a heart-warming smile.

‘Coz I always chased him out of my room. I felt guilty, of course. I love this boy to death. But sometimes he can be a real pain-in-the-ass.

He’ll steal my money, poke at my laptop screen, mess up my table, steal my teddys, and draw on my things. He’s the natural disaster of the Satar household.

He can talk now, but it sounds like a mixture of English, Malay, French, Indian, and @$#!-ish. But whatever it is, it sounds cute.

So I was just sitting on the bed with him. We played abit of peek-a-boo, and the rest of the time I was just watching this lil’ bundle of joy entertain himself.

Then he pretended to pick something up, gave it to me and said “Happy Birthday, kakak”. Lol. He loves playing birthdays, esp. blowing out the candles.

So I asked him what was it he just gave me. He tried to come up with something but he couldn’t, so he just grinned sheepishly.

Then he pretended to pick something up again, and gave it to me. I asked him again what was it. Then he traced his fingers around his neck, and said, “Love kakak”.

Okay, maybe it was supposed to be a necklace to symbolize his love for me, but again… aww, what a sweetheart.

Sure hope he gets a nice, decent girl when he grows up. *Muacks*

2006-03-26T08:05:00.000-08:00

I came across a nice site called Group Hug where people actually make anonymous confessions online. I thought it was interesting ‘coz sometimes when you feel absolutely shitty about something, and you can’t even tell your best friend, you dunno who to turn to.

Here's some nice material.

Some suffering from guilt-trips or depression:

“I am no one. I am nothing.”

“I have a nice house and a nice car.
I go to a good school in a good neighborhood.
I have intelligence and maybe even looks.
My life seems promising but most of the day I hate my life just like you.”

“I'm sick of being fat and out of shape
I'm sick of having depression
I'm sick of not having a perfect family
I'm sick of wanting to die
I'm sick of hating myself
I'm sick of being sick and tired.”

Some simply suffer from lust disorders:

“Is it a bad sign that I never masturbate to my girlfriend? Always to anyone else but her.”

“I like to pee on people. Sorry jess. I know you weren’t expecting that. :( ”

“I have sexual fantasies about albino cats.”

“Sometimes I put my finger in my butt and then smell it. It smells great. I know anyone else would hate it but I love it.”

Some purty funny ones:

“I am afraid to have a baby because what if he or she turns out to be retarded? I don't want a retarded baby.”

“I'm gay. Sorry dad.”

“When I got my math quiz back last Friday I saw that I got an A-. I tried so hard to fight back tears.”

“I honestly believe my dad has a crush on me.”

And some other shocking ones:

“I want to cut off her nipples and pull out her teeth. Cut off all her fingers and toes one knuckle at a time. Force her to drink my urine and eat my excrement. Hold naked flames to her skin until it blisters and burns. Put maggots into her festering wounds. Abuse, degrade, humiliate and torture her in every way possible."

“My mom died from cancer two years ago and my dad said I resent him because I wish he died instead of her. And he's right.”

“We started cutting each others arms and stomachs up with a Gillette blade. It was easily the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced.”

Rated at least M-18. And these are only few of 'em.

More at: grouphug.us

2006-03-23T04:41:00.000-08:00

I think I miss sec school for the wrong reasons. My best friend and I would spend every single day in class just singing the lessons away with songs from our fav. boybands. But of course… we often got into trouble for not being able to answer the questions. But that’s the fun of it, see! High school ain’t fun without a little mischief.

In my opinion, sec school was a time full of pop boyband obsessions, and pretty boy crushes. I mean, that was one of the main reasons why I go to school – boys. My entire world revolved around them. My heart would just start thumping like crazy, and I loved every minute of it! I feel that it’s absolutely normal for stupid girls like me to go through such a stage.

I would spend endless hours online just staring at pretty popstars... because they were just so pretty and perfect! I loved their hair, their gorgeous eyes, their perfect smile…

My eye candy:

And my favourite candy! Yum!

Total boyband domination, woohoooo!

*Sigh* Reminiscence – what perfectly pretty memories.

2006-03-19T12:19:00.000-08:00

Okay so the pr0nSTAs got chatting the other day... and mut, Nora, and Garf came up with this idea that we should make our own name cards... though I'm not sure what for but, why not? Lol. Then from there we kinda developed our own pr0nSTA logo. And Nora came up with a motto for us, "To serve is to corrupt". We're still trying to refine the whole idea. And if everything goes well, maybe we'll have our own t-shirt too. :-)

(Logo)

(Name card)

Contents: Name, nickname, contact, diploma... and a half-naked body.

It represents the whole idea of pr0nSTAs.

Lol.

2006-03-17T20:05:00.000-08:00

PG0207s kite-flying was cancelled. So I stayed home and ate Maggie. Didnt realize how nice Maggie is. Havent had it for almost a year. Lol. So Ruz called yesterday, and we ran into several arguments.

(Sometime around 2pm)
* ring * ring *
Ruz: Youre at home? I thought you were going out with your class?
Natz: Got postponed to next week.
R: Ohhh. Come my house lah.
N: Dun want lah! I got stuff to do.
R: Alahhh. Come lah, very long never come my house. My parents miss you.
N: ...
N: You should have told me earlier that youre not working today.
R: You should have told me youre not going out today.
N: Well I would but I thought YOU said you were only free on Thursday.
R: I have Thursday and Friday off.
N: Then isnt that your fault?? If I knew you were free today I would let you know but coz you said you were only free Thursday, I didnt tell you. Hah!
R: Dont start pushing the blame on me.

Then I told her that I wrote a blog entry on the stuff she used to say about Filly in our diary. We put down the phone so she can go read it.
(15 minutes later)
* ring * ring *
Ruz: NATZ! TAKE DOWN THAT ENTRY!!
Natz: Na-ah. No way.
R: Its embarrassing okay!
N: I know.
R: Its soooo embarrassing
N: I even told Filly to go read it.
R: What?!
N: Dont worry lah Ruz. Not that many people read it... except my friends.
R: WHAT?!
N: I mean we have to think of the majority here. Can't take down the entry just because of you. So its you against the world.

From the malu-ating blog entry we talked about this idiotic lady she ran into outside the bank.

Ruz: I walked out of the bank then this lady said, "Uh… can you please give me $2? I want to eat." Then I said, "No!" Then when I walked away, she said, "SELFISH!!"
Natz: Couldnt you just give the woman $2? I mean for Gods sake, she hasnt had her br-unch.
R: No way! I won’t give her. I mean, she looked like she was wearing nice clothes and all that. She didnt look that poor.
N: Yah, but who knows maybe she already spent all her money and shes hungry and all she wanted was $2 so she can go eat but you wont give it to her. Its people like you that make the world a terrible place to live in.
R: Then you know what? I saw her go into Qiji and buy food from there.
N: Whats Qiji?
R: Its a place where they sell food for about $8 - $10.
N: She probably asked $2 from four other people. Lucky they were generous enough to give it to her.
R: I mean if she got no money, how can she eat at an expensive place? She should eat at the kopitiam in AMK Central.
N: But all she wanted was to eat at Qiji! Maybe she only had like $6 and you were too selfish to give her that extra $2.
R: But why must she eat there??!
N: Because all she wanted was to eat at Qiji! SELFISH!!!

We argued for about an hour more. Lucky that lady got what she wanted - to eat at Qiji. Lol.

2006-03-15T04:24:00.000-08:00

Hmm... so I was looking through some webbies and I found some really weird but farnie stuff:

"Dieting can cause bad breath since less saliva is produced which leads to dry mouth" (Know what this means? Don't diet before you go for a job interview)

"Sex burns 360 calories per hour" (Think I saw mut tag something like that somewhere before...)

"If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of Superman" (If I farted for 6 yrs 9 mths, would I be Superman... or Paris Hilton?)

"The shoe and the foot are the most common sources of sexual fetishism in Western society" (Foot fetish? Ewwwwwww)

"Banging your head against an ant uses 150 calories an hour" (Just do it 2 more times, you'd burn more calories than sex)

"If you are locked in a completely sealed room, you will die of pleasure before you die of oxygen deprivation" (Just know that you'll get pleasure before pain)

"Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times" (Sennheiser users... beware)

And some nice pics:

Resources:
http://www.amusingfacts.com/ http://www.bitoffun.com/Weird_stuff.htm http://members.shaw.ca/mcramer1/weirdfacts.htm http://www.stunning-stuff.com/list-funny-facts/6.html?pg=3

2006-03-13T08:00:00.000-08:00

You know in secondary school, just when you think you were cool... If you look back at yourself 5 years later, you'll realise how lame-ass-nerd you actually were.

I never realised it... I actually believed I WAS cool then... Then my best friend, Ruz, called last night and we decided to read our diaries from Sec 2 and 3... I was so disgusted I don't think I want to re-live high school... It was the era of mega boy-crushes, girl gossips, major backstabbings, and more boy-crushes :) So we'd write it all down in our diary... Cute.

Some entires I found quite facinating:

Natz's:
"Sorri 4 not coming 2dae... I juz didn't feel like it... The reasons:
1. Don't 1 2 see Ms Lims face
2. Haven't do Maths
3. Dunno what was last week's Art hw
4. I lost my Pancaran Bahasa book. Scared must stand outside.
5. I don't 1 2 see Nath's face... "

Typical excuses for skipping school...

"Do you know what's my new hobby? You wouldn't believe it... it's stitching!!"

Okay... I probably won't be able to face anyone again after revealing this entry... But I thought it was good enough to win "Nerd of the Century" Award... It was something I wrote for this guy I really liked. Sec 2 material, okay.

"You melt my heart so deeply that I can't feel,
The happiness welling up inside me, that's real,
This broken heart of mine can never be healed,
Until you say you love me, like it's such a big deal.

Your every move makes me sway,
As if a big wind is blowing hard against me,
I need to know how long will you be away,
Until you come back, I'll be able to breathe.

Your eyes are as sweet as a puppy's,
Your heart is as heartwarming as the fire,
When I see you, I scream "Whoopee!",
Like you are my only desire."

... I'm getting goosebumps...

Ruz's:
"... Before I start, let me name my crushes... hahaha... here goes nothing!!...
Filbert (Filly), Dexter, Jan Fazley, Hidir, Simon! (ahem), Wilson, Ashley... "

Lol... Ruz, Ruz... Sorry to humiliate you publicly... But I couldn't help it :P

"He walks pass... man... I'm having a nervous breakdown... awww... Fil just walk pass me again... now sitting beside BJ... gosh... I'm watching his every move... gosh... he's sitting opposite me now!! ahh... natz... he's so gorgeous..."

Ruz... I don't mean to be rude but... Wait 'til Filly reads this! Hahahaha!!! Sucker.

"Natz... can i tell you something? I know i'm not supposed to write this... Natz!!! He was eye-ing at me... he looks by the side siak!! alamak... i'm melting... he really likes me~~ hahahahaha... Natz... the way he eats Oreo is the same as me... hahaha... amazing!!"

Errr... NERD ALERT!

But I think it's just a normal phase of high school to go through these things... I mean, for a girl. Phew, so many crushes we had. They came and left. Each time one left, a new one came in. And the tiniest signal of attention we got from them was considered "love"... Ewww... Sombody bite me.

2006-02-19T08:30:00.000-08:00

A few days ago I received news that my godfather, Bapak, was critically ill in hospital. The doctor asked all family members to come visit. “There’s no hope left,” he said.

My godparents took care of me since I was a tiny little baby. Through my kindergarten and primary school days, they’d make the effort to come pick me up and live with them during the holidays, although they lived in Johor. I considered them my 2nd parents. They always bought me what I wanted, and before I left for home, they always gave me $10 pocket money. Those were the best days of my childhood.

As we walked down the halls of SGH to Bapak’s ward, memories of the day my mother died came flooding back. I remembered turning the same corner where my aunt turned to me and said, “She’s gone…” I hate going through this phase. Please don’t let anyone leave me again…

As we turned into one of the rooms and walked towards Bapak’s bed, I was relieved to see my godmother, Mak, there. She always makes me feel secure, ever since I was little. Although her husband was at the brink of death, she still tried to put a brave front by smiling, pretending that everything was alright. But I knew it wasn’t. The evidence was right before my eyes.

Dreadfully I turned to look at Bapak and almost immediately, tears rolled down my face. Back then, he always had a smile on his face when he saw me, and when I told him stupid jokes he’d give this big laughter as if it was the funniest thing in the world. I remember his soft-spoken voice whenever he talked to me. He never raised his voice, or laid a finger on me.

The man that lay before me wasn’t anything I remembered when I was little. He could not laugh or smile anymore. He was not even aware of my presence. He stared blankly into space, waiting for time to pass by. Just waiting… for his time to arrive. I didn’t want to accept this fact... I didn’t want it to be true. I didn’t want it to be him.

I want to be living in the 90s again. When everyone was still alive and well. When there were no worries about anyone dying. When I was 9 and sitting at the dinner table with Mak and Bapak chatting and laughing away. When everything was okay.

After primary school, I never got to see them that much except for Hari Raya. When my mum passed away, I was surprised when I saw Mak standing in the doorway. I quickly ran into her arms to seek the comfort I needed.

When we visited them last Hari Raya, I was astounded when I found every single photograph hanging on their walls were pictures of me when I was little. I was so moved. That was when I realized how much they really cherished me as their child.

As my family was about to leave the ward, I stood still and looked sadly at Bapak. My father’s words, “This may be the last time you’re seeing him,” kept playing in my head. I bent down to kiss him on the forehead. Thank you Bapak for all the wonderful years you gave me. Slowly he turned towards me with empty but earnest eyes. I still couldn’t believe this was happening. I started choking between sobs.

As I turned to Mak, I knew she was trying to hold back her tears. But the moment she saw me choking uncontrollably, her tears started flowing freely. She took me in her arms and embraced me like she’s never embraced me before. I felt like a child again, being protected by her mother from harm. I hugged her back to give her the comfort she gave me for 12 years. She’s never cried on my shoulder before. I didn’t want to let go. She was going to have to face another loss. She’s already lost 2 sons to asthma, and now she’s left with one.

I cried as I left the room. I cried on the way home. I cried myself to sleep. I still haven’t stopped crying since. Bapak, please don’t leave…

2006-02-14T07:40:00.000-08:00

I'm a very patient person. But to all the the con-bitches and bastards out there, stay the FUDGE out of my way, if you know what's good for you.

Who the FUDGE are you to come steal our money?!?! If I get my hands on you, I'll dig your intestines with my own bare hands!! I'll claw away the layers of your flesh, grip your slimy intestines and FUDGING tug it away from all its bloody arteries!!! I'll watch you bleed like the Niagara Falls until the very last drop! MotherFUDGERS!! You don't know what the FUDGE we went through to get our money. You make money-making look like child's play!!

Well "ha ha" to that you FUDGING IMBECILE BRAINLESS BOOBS!! You cost my father $30 000!! Do you FUDGING know what he went through to get that shit?! And do you FUDGING know what he went through to replace that $30 000 you FUDGING stole from us?!?!?! Well FUCK YOU!! 'Coz if you don't you better start learning!!!!! My father works his ass off day and night, and still doesn't get what he deserves. His life is already miserable... so FUCK OFF and don't make it any worse for him!!!!!